MORE “LOVE NOTES”…AND AN INVITATION
Hello James,
Sometimes it feels very disturbing to see our ego dancing before us
and ourselves not able to detach from its stories. It is upsetting to
know the hidden motives behind our actions which we never suspected of
playing the trick, most of the time these are our fear, defence, pride
in our possessions, judgement, anger etc. Because of ego I cannot
forgive myself or others, I cannot forgive my ego. Rarely I do
something because of love, mostly it’s ego. Even the personal love was
only ego, I never loved the person for what he was in his being, the
rejection I felt was ego. This feeling of being trapped in ego is
surfacing at an increasingly greater rate and it is frightening…..
As if I am watching my ego desperately trying to survive….. I wish
I could die now…. into something unknown….. not wanting to know
what.
I find myself unable to help this frustrating situation. Will it end?
Why I am so powerless? Why ego is so much intractable? Please help.
With love
D.
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Hello D,
I’m just back from the Science and Nonduality conference ( http://www.scienceandnonduality.com/index.shtml ) It was full of wonder and deep connection!
Yes, there does appear to be a separate “me” and “ego”…in truth they’re the same. So let’s briefly explore our ego.
The ego is an invention of the mind; the mind is a sense like the other five. Combined together, the ego/mind and the body are this creature called “me” and “you” by this nonentity called “my ego”.
And who or what is this “creature” other than ego?
Ego is an illusion; it is all imagined by our mind which is programmed or conditioned by the cultural and natural eco-system we were born into. There’s nothing wrong here, of course. The ego is a product, an outcome of the nature of life. This Life in which we are one. ..a One that includes all.
The good news gets better! What we are is love. Not an egoic self love but a Self love- a love that loves itSelf. That delights in itself.
Nature is in love with it own nature, its self creations. Like the sun that shines on and nourishes organic life on earth., it just gives endlessly of itself.
Does some of this ring your inner bell? Let’s stop here, dwell in aware Self-loveing.
You alone can go past these words, these ideas…avoid the ego-minds concepts about this truth; know this truth for yourself.
Be well D. and please stay in touch.
James
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Thank you very much for this post; a ”stage” in/on which I am right now and it’s frustrating to my ego ofcourse and I feels
like a neverending battle.
Letting go, seeing through, reading and
just keep on living my own truth, seems like
a good way to go. No tricks no short cuts.
Thanks very much for all the insights and truth revelations on this website.
Bring it on!
Dear Francis
One of my teachers-Adyashanti- has used a great saying from Star Wars: “Resistance is futile!” So don’t resist the resistance, live in that awareness too, and follow willingly wherever spirit leads. Life itself provides for itself; it is what you are. The Chinese have an ancient saying: “The tree will fall the way it leans”…let yourself fall into love, into grace, into unknowing. There, we find the peace and contentment of our unborn nature. And we find we never left or lost this that we already are…love.
Enjoy yourself!
James
Hello James,
Thank You for your reply. In the last few days it was difficult for me
to let go of conflicts happening in my family. I could see myself
judging everything before it was over and quickly relating them to the
past and fixed images. Sometimes I jumped to vocalise my anger and
hurt them, and I took side of the victim.
But in spite of this surfacing of my tendencies, there is a voice
inside which tells to stop and just let the feeling pass. I have
started listening to it. Thanks again for your guidance on this
strange but beautiful path.
love
D.
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Hi D,
Yes indeed, as you say:..”stop and just let the feeling pass” When we stop, we don’t deny or disconect with a thought or feeling; we accept it fully into awareness, and let it go, knowing what it is- just a thought/feeling and not about “me”. Allowing is an alert, passive action…allowing everything to be exactly as it is. Sometimes that allowing may leave a little residue which we also allow. As Adyashanti says ” don’t resist the resistance!” Gradually, that too, dissolves in the unborn; that nonpersonal inner stillness that embraces all that comes and goes with love.
Be well my friend.
James